Goat is Set to Run in Russian Parliamentary Elections

Relax, this is Russia: a goat will run for a lawmaker’s seat as an independent candidate.

You have probably heard about the dynamic duo of Amur the Tiger and Timur the Goat, the two animal celebrities from Russia. If not, let me brief you on them: in late November, Timur was thrown to the tiger in a safari park in Russia’s Far East, but right out of the blue the supposed-to-be meal and the predator made good friends, and the life of the two joined-at-the-hip animals became a live-broadcast reality show on TV.

So Timur the goat will pursue a political career. He will run as a self-nominated candidate from a single-member constituency in the upcoming parliamentary elections this year, the safari park’s head announced in an interview with LifeNews TV-channel.

“The goat doesn’t lie, he doesn’t steal, doesn’t engage in yakety yak. He will be able to vote: tail up means ‘yes’, tail down means ‘no’ and if he doesn’t wave his tail it means he abstains from voting.”

However, the goat may stumble over an unexpected obstacle. On January 26, Timur and Amur had a brawl ending with the tiger slightly biting the even-toed fellow; the goat was shocked and put in a separate open-air cage. Luckily, he avoided any serious injuries.

To heal his psychic trauma, the keepers held an all-Russia beauty pageant among female goats and chose a girlfriend for the lawmaker wannabe. Her name is Merkel. May a suspicious love affair cast an imputation on the politically-oriented goat’s career or even nip it in the bud? Let’s hope not.

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